The Song in Her Eyes

“Slowly time ticks away,
Making way for a new day.
Oh! I’ve been waiting for so long,
To see again in your eyes the Song.

“The Song I’d seen not-so-long ago;
The voice I’d heard, oh! So mellow!
Its not been long,but I’ve been waiting an Eternity
If I don’t see her again, God, have pity.

“I’ve seen oceans fall and oceans rise
But nothing like the depth of Her eyes
If only I could plunge into the depth of the Song
If only She could know that I’ve waited this long.

“The Song beckons me wherever I go
The Song transcends everything I know
Oh!please tell me the Song’s for me
‘Coz I’m reeling in anxiety.

“There are wars waging, there are battles to be won,
I have to go, and keep moving on
If I could only keep the song in the war
Yes, I’d have something to live for.

“There is a Song in her voice, a Song in her eyes,
A song in her gait, a Song in her guise;
Little do I know, but I do realize,
Yes, I’m crazy for the Song in your eyes.”

“That was written by Shrenique Golecha, on the October 20th at 2:33 pm, in his very own perspective.”

Perspective

How its all about Perspective!

“Coffee?” I asked.

“Sure.”

CCD.

“Waiter, One Devil’s own. One Kaapi Nirvana.” I ordered.

“Are you sure these are the right things?”

“Yeah, these are the best CCD offers, according to me. I am sure you will like it too. I hope your stomach upset is better than the last time.

” I was telling you about George Mallory. This book’s written about him. As I already said, this book is not Jeffrey Archer’s best, but the reason I like it so much is because its true. I knew about George Mallory’s failed attempt long back.Jeffrey Archer’s interview was in the papers before the release of this book. He said that he’d taken up a true story for his new book this time and that is why he had had so many restrictions in writing this book. Most importantly, he could not distort George Mallory just because some people knew of him. He had to cater to both audiences, those who knew him and those who didn’t.

“Its this debate that comes up now that whether George Mallory deserves to be called the first Man to have conquered the Everest. The exact happenings of the fateful day of ascent are shrouded in mystery. But the mountaineering world is divided into two factions - one who believes that it is irrelevant whether he scaled it or not because he did not come back alive, and another who, knowing him and his force of character, ‘likes to believe’ that he actually did it. I am, of course, one of the latter.

” Those who know him swear by the fact that he had such a force of character that he would surely have made it to the top. He certainly deserves appreciation given the fact that it was only after thirty years of his fateful attempt, that Edmund Hillary managed to scale the peak. Now, Thirty years is long time. A lot of advancements and research happened during this period. None of the attempts in the intermediate years bore results. While George Mallory was initially skeptical about using artificial aid like the oxygen cylinder, Edmund Hillary had access to light weight advanced oxygen cylinders and other aid that were developed by then.

“But more than his achievements, the different aspects of his personality, disclosed during the course of the book, that appeals to my heart most. The way he proposes his Ruth, the way he loves Ruth so much, yet must part with her forever for his sole ambition, the way he climbs the wall of Cambridge to enter it…

“So, its all about perspective that matters. You could pick up the book and read it just like any other novel. Or, you could read it with a different perspective by keeping in mind that you are reading about a legend who ‘walked the earth in flesh and blood.’

“Perspective is really that magical thing. It can change your view of the world. Look at the busy street there. You can see a traffic jam. People are jostling for space, hurling abuses at one another, frustrated in the heat. Close your eyes. Change your perspective. Look at the street again now. What can you see? You can see unharnessed energy. You can see zeal and enthusiasm to do something, reach the destination before anyone else. Look at the vigor and vitality that you can see even in the most unrelenting heat. Its something to derive inspiration from.

“Now, I want to show you something. But first you must promise me that for the next few moments, you are going to forget about yourself, forget that you are. You are not going to bring in your perspective. Just my perspective. Look at it from only and only my perspective.

“Its a poem I ‘ve written in a moment of inspiration. Read it. Wait. Let me read it out for you.

The Song in Her Eyes

“Slowly time ticks away,
Making way for a new day.
Oh! I’ve been waiting for so long,
To see again in your eyes the Song.

“The Song I’d seen not-so-long ago;
The voice I’d heard, oh! So mellow!
Its not been long,but I’ve been waiting an Eternity
If I don’t see her again, God, have pity.

“I’ve seen oceans fall and oceans rise
But nothing like the depth of Her eyes
If only I could plunge into the depth of the Song
If only She could know that I’ve waited this long.

“The Song beckons me wherever I go
The Song transcends everything I know
Oh!please tell me the Song’s for me
‘Coz I’m reeling in anxiety.

“There are wars waging, there are battles to be won,
I have to go, and keep moving on
If I could only keep the song in the war
Yes, I’d have something to live for.

“There is a Song in her voice, a Song in her eyes,
A song in her gait, a Song in her guise;
Little do I know, but I do realize,
Yes, I’m crazy for the Song in your eyes.”

“That was written by Shrenique Golecha, on the October 20th at 2:33 pm, in his very own perspective.”

“And yes, I do love my external HDD. Yeah I do. But You know, that I have this problem of not-being-able-to -say-no. Consequently, it ends up staying up with my friends and acquaintances more than with me. That’s why its in such a dilapidated condition. Ditto case with my book.”

I don’t know what the reply was. Because there had been no one around.

Inexplicable

I understand that there are reasons why its called “falling” in love. One ignores the most important of situations that demands attention, just to be  virtually with the beloved. There seems to be no end of this addiction, infatuation, day-dreaming, etc.

But one still falls. Not that one does it purposefully. It just happens. Every one is not endowed with infinite self-restraint to hold back the impulsive feelings. In fact there are the very reasons why its inexplicable - Love.

The best short stories I’ve read are about love. They all have a variety of interpretations. But one common factor - they all point to how inexplicable Love is. But that is my philosophy about the finer emotions that Man is capable of like Love. That any action that Man does, in this regard, cannot be attributed to one specific reason, but to a variety of reasons, and that the cumulative effect of these reasons can’t be explained by the doer himself.

The Gift of the Magi by O’ Henry left a lasting impression on me. It showed how sacrifice is a major component of Love. For me, I have this innate ability to sacrifice, without any reservations. If I am going for a good dinner with friends, sometimes I come across beggars who probably haven’t had a full meal in ages. Not every time, but I have sometimes, settled for a less expensive meal, giving a part of my original expense to the beggar. I love to sacrifice, even if it is for strangers. It gives me a vicarious delight.

Talk of sacrifice in love, and I believe, as I was telling my closest friend and fellow-introvert, that once two people are in love, the love between them becomes a bigger entity than the two people themselves, individually. They both must, then, look up to that love, compromise, sacrifice and mutually accommodate each other for the bigger entity of Love.

The second short story I would like to mention about is “Old Love” by Jeffrey Archer. It shows how two arch rivals end up falling in Love. The climax is heart wrenching. One realizes at the end of the story how two lovers, though starkly different personalities, love each other so much that even death can’t do them apart.

The third short story is Guy de Maupassant’s “Happiness.” The theme of this short story is whether Love is an infinite emotion or whether it gets saturated with time. This story aroused a curiosity in me. I had no answer to it. The movie Veer Zaara also had an element of the same theme in it.

These stories take different perspectives of the same emotion. After reading these, one comes to the conclusion, that one can only feel Love, not explain it. It’s like God - the same theory applies to him - there are numerous explanations, but He can only be felt, not explained.

But, hasn’t one heard of the quote “God is Love”? So:

“Tujh me Rab dikhta hai, yaara main kya karu,

Sajde Sar jhukta hai, yaara main kya karu.”

On Gandhi

I was watching MTV. Elijah Wood was being interviewed. He was asked “What’s your favorite Movie?”

“Gandhi.”

While the west continues to see Gandhi with increased reverence, the “Mahatma” and “Father of the Nation” continues to be shunned more and more by the people of his own country. He does not appeal to the youth, who are neither well versed in History, nor have enough intellect to analyze the man as a person, irrespective of the factors of Independence in his times.

I do have great respect for the man. He practiced what he preached. People abhor his fine teachings. He taught self control, by not giving in to impulses like anger, lust and violence. Self restraint is the virtue that is the base on which civilization is built, isn’t it?If we all gave in to base feelings like these, what different would we be from animals? Why, we would be like dogs, mating with a different woman every season, barking and biting anyone whom we feel like. He did not teach us anything new. He just reminded the people to move from the base level to a different level that befits Man. Unfortunately, what he taught, barring few intellectuals, nobody could comprehend.

It shows that we are past our peak of intellectual development as a collective people. The downfall has begun. Reversal will take place and we will be back to the stone age, when Man will be just another animal. That is, if we survive 21st December, 2012.

NO HUMOR IN HEAVEN

Mark Twain once said that there is no humor in heaven. How profound! If you look closely at humor, you will find that the root of all humor is sorrow,suffering and pain.

All the popular jokes about beggars, minorities, etc are a mockery of their subversion. When friends pull each others legs, they make fun of each others’ inabilities. It is the human psychology of dominance, to find pleasure in others shortcomings that becomes the root of all humor.

If you argue that there is no pain or suffering at the base of the common sex - humor, I have two arguments to put forth. It does have the element of pain and suffering. It highlights the dominance over the females by the males of the society, everywhere, over the ages. It highlights the growing insecurity felt by the males, now that the females are fighting for their right place and equality in the society. Also,it highlights the innate weakness of males when it comes to dealing with females.

When there are jokes made about some great personality, it is the human psyche that resists dominance, again, that brings out humor to innocuously curb the impact of that personality. The same goes when students make fun of teachers, when subordinates make fun of seniors.

What when seniors make fun of juniors? Again, it is the arrogance, and the reiteration to oneself that “I am the boss!” that brings out such humor.

Humor, as it is, is harmless. It is a great way to vent out our ill feelings due to differences. But, in heaven as there are no imperfections, as there are no ill feelings, and as there are no differences, so there is no pain and suffering and therefore, there is no humor, too.

An Extinct Species - the Multi-Talented

Leonardo da Vinci was an Italian polymath, writer, painter, engineer, scientist, mathematician, inventor, sculptor, botanist and musician. Could there have been another like him?Maybe. There just may have been someone who, probably, did not become as famous, but was perhaps, as versatile as him. Can there be another like him? In all probability, no.

These are times of specialization. Four years ago, When I’d finally decided to pursue engineering, after much deliberation over Commerce,Science and even Arts, I had to break my head all over again to decide which branch of engineering from a plethora of choices - Computer, Electronics, Electrical(Yes, electronics and electrical are entirely different branches),Electronics and Telecommunication, Chemical, Mechanical, Mechatronics, Instrumentation, Civil…and the list goes on.

They say a few decades ago there were few choices in this regard. There were just the now-called “conventional” branches of engineering.

The point I want to make is that there is so much “specialization” these days that it is virtually impossible for a novice to decide which specialized branch of anything is he exactly interested in. If someone likes maths, for instance, it is not enough. He must decide which area of mathematics he is particularly strong in so that he can decide upon a career. Algebra?Geometry?Mensuration?Calculus? I am a hundred percent sure that he will not be able to say precisely. But when that question is put forth, one tends to put a bold face forward,hide the hesitance and decide an area. Only, to realize later that it was not the right decision after all. It happens with a lot of people. And in the end, they have wasted precious time, energy and money.

Times have changed. I like to read literature and write. When people find that out, they, inadvertently, tell me why didn’t I take up arts and what the heck was I doing in an Engineering College. I have nothing to tell them. They are so involved in their “own fields” that they wouldn’t even know of the examples I told them, if I were to cite. Like, most writers, painters,etc in the post renaissance period from Europe were not only what they were known for, but also experts in medicine, science and other spheres.

I am at the crossroads of life, again. I have decided to pursue an MBA. But, again, just that is not enough. I must soon decide MBA  in what - Finance, Marketing, Operations, Systems. Those were the “conventional fields.” There are lot of “specialized” fields that have come up - “MBA in retail management”, “MBA in Chain Supply Management”, etc. So, I have a lot to choose from. Right, People?

Birds of the same feather MUST flock together

I have this bad quality of being affable. I get along too easily with too many people. Spells doom for me, quite a few times. As a result, I am trying hard these days to change my nature to being reserved.

A lot of incidents happen almost everyday that makes me feel that perhaps I am in the wrong place with the wrong people. But because I am so accommodating, I don’t let people realize that “Dude, you’re talking to the wrong guy!”

Take today, for example. There are these two rustics from some corner of U.P. whom I don’t particularly like but still, have friendly terms with.

“Hi”, they said.

“Hi”, I said with a characteristic smile.”Going home for Diwali?”

“Yeah, probably. You must be not even thinking of going home,right?”, they sneered.

“Actually, I will be going home.”

“Where, Bhusawal?”, they said with a sly sarcastic smile.

“No, home this time.”

Now, it is difficult for me to put in words what mental wars were actually going on. I am a kind of person who comes from a strong extended-family-conections background. As a result, I go to different places in different vacations - New Delhi, Chennai, Home(Siliguri), Kolkata, Mumbai and sometimes Bhusawal(being near Pune and preferable for small vacations).

I don’t know what exactly they had in mind before talking of Bhusawal with contempt. Probably because its a small place. But even they belong to smaller less developed place. Probably because its in Maharashtra and these stupid people from UP - Bihar have this anti-Maharashtra attitude out of some imaginary unreal reason. After all, if they are really against this place then why flock here in herds???

I am not interested in the reason. I just want to believe that because I travel so much and to different places, in this case, I am at a different level than theirs. Probably they can never realize it. But I know I am right, that their mockery is that of “lesser kinds”, and I don’t care. I pity at their mundane levels of understanding of the world and its working. But I also realize that if I go talking, mixing with people who don’t have the regard(rather, who don’t have the “ability” to regard) for such little yet lofty things, it is my own reputation, my ideals that I am putting at stake. I must utterly disregard these lesser mortals.

Now our college is in a forsaken corner of the city. Everyone used to crib in their first year, that the place is boring and they were feeling out of place. So they shifted to some intermediate place between the city and the college in flats for rent. I decided to stay in the hostel for some or the other reasons. Now when I meet some acquaintance after a long time, because he shifted out, he sneers at me saying “Still in the hostel??Man, your life sucks, you suck!” I am surprised at this.

First of all, it is my decision, and I don’t want your opinion on it. Secondly, and most importantly, the hostel is a far better place to “live” in. The people who stay in intermediate places between the college and the city suffer for anything for lights, water, electricity,food and cleanliness. The college makes sure there is a regular water supply here in the hostel, that the generator runs whenever the current goes and there is a dedicated house keeping staff. I don’t have to worry about everyday food as a lot of messes are around. I admit that the quality of the food is not upto the mark, but at least we can complaint. There are glitches in the management of the hostel, but we can complaint and demand. They can’t. They are near to a lot of fun places doesn’t mean they can eat out everyday. All they can do is request some “auntie” to provide them with “sub standard” food for lunch and dinner, and they can’t complaint.

I have a clean room, a clean bed, a clean bathroom. They have none of these, besides having an overhead of traveling everyday from the city. Besides, bachelors are not looked upon as worthy tenants by most people as they are generally a source of nuisance to most people around. Thirdly, they become very cut off from the college and other friends other than their room mates as they live in different parts of the city.Those staying in the hostel are well connected because everyone does come to the college

.

Most people cite the most important reason for shifting “outside” is having fun. But I have as much fun as I want to and as much fun as anyone else. Whenever I feel bored I go to the city, eat out, watch a movie, do all sorts of weird stuff that most people living in flats do. So what is the big deal? I had my reasons for not shifting. You have your reasons for shifting. I respect your position. You must respect mine. Simple. Why poke unnecessarily?

But because I do not say anything in return, because I get so dumbstruck at their “dumbness” that for a while I am unable to comprehend how can people be so “stupid”,”dumb”,etc. Why can’t they reason things out?Most importantly, most people have this idea that anyone who is not like them is a “fool.” I just don’t like to buy their philosophies of life. I would rather not argue, I don’t want to “cast pearls before swine.”

I know its a trivial matter. Someone else, if in my place, would have dismissed it. But its me. I am sensitive. I think if I could get some one who thinks on the same levels and lines as me, I would be at ease.

Experience of the Occult

I was a practical person with a scientific approach to life. Until yesterday.

I was witness to one of the most belief-shattering experiences,for me, yesterday. Lights went out. Candles were lit. In the dimness I could see a twinkle in the eyes of two of my friends. I could guess they had some mischief in mind. But what exactly, I couldn’t have figured out.

They drew out a blank paper. Marked the alphabets and numbers on it. There were three circles in the centre of the page with “Home”, “Yes” and “No.” They pulled out a coin and placed it on the “Home.”

They warned me to respect the presence of the “Holy Spirits.” They warned me against any tomfoolery during the “calling” or “talking” process. I was game. I wanted to see how well they would be able to convince me with this one. I wanted to see how long would I take this time to catch some “give-away” movement by them.

They started. It barely took a minute of silent concentration and request before the coin started to move in response to their questions.

“Are you there?If yes, then please move to Yes.”

The coin moved to Yes.

“Are you comfortable answering our questions?If yes then move to Yes.”

Yes.

“What is my name?” asked one of them whose index finger was touching the coin, to keep it under control.

Letter by letter, it marked the right name.

“What is my name?”, the other one asked.

Right answer. Again.

“What is Shrenique’s real sister’s name?” asked someone.

Now, although we have been together for four years now in the hostel, we still hardly know about each other’s families, let alone names.

This was THE moment for me when I was really taken aback. It not only marked the correct name, but with the correct spelling too. The name is such that there is a good possibility of making a mistake. But it was spot on.

I have reason to believe that none of my friends coerced the coin because such a question, that too at such a time, would take at least some hesitation or time if it were to be answered by some of my friends.

We asked a few questions about our results, placements. For me, it was a mixed bag with Placement in December but poor academic result. I became really uncomfortable with such future-related questions. The consequences of such knowledge, even if it’s authenticity could not be verified, could be disastrous.

On my insistence, they asked “Do you want to go?”

Yes.

There was silent prayer requesting the Spirit to leave.

We asked a few more questions to verify that it had gone. There was no movement. They let go of the coin.

I thought a lot about the incident. Naturally, I was not able to sleep. My basic beliefs in the ultimate truth of Science had just been shattered. I realized there was some more that what meets the eye. There were forces at work. There was a God, after all. I was not an atheist, but I used to have my doubts. It was definitely cleared. If such an unexplainable could happen, there definitely was someone more powerful.

So that meant that things like fate,destiny, karma, blessings,curses were not entirely incredulous. They, in fact, were very much live and a part of the Creation too. There was a Creator,after all.

While my faith in God became firm, I also realized that probably every of these things, those that we know of and that we don’t, have their own dimensions. Human knowledge is restricted to his own dimension. There are things beyond our dimension, like those of the spirits, then those of the Angels etc. Humans,over-curious that they are, tend to explore everything they can in their quest for supremacy. They have mastered their own dimension,stretching their rights to the extreme, after taming, in the process putting at stake, forces such as Nature. Now they even experiment with other dimensions. However, its not right to play with God’s creations. There are certain things that are meant to be left alone. Humans must not abuse their independence. They will put their own existence in jeopardy.

Moreover, if the spirits are one level closer to God in the hierarchy, and if they could be interacted with, in such less time, then should we not rather spend our time “concentrating” and “praying” for the someone who is there at the top of the hierarchy, than for some much low? WIth some more effort, maybe we could converse with Him, too. Lets not waste our time and energy in such fruitless,dangerous endeavors. Lets do something to make our rightful dimension a better place.